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Sunday, December 11, 2011

The End and The Beginning Wrapped Up In One

So this is it. I couldn't tell you how many times I have actaully said that to myself and always seem to change my mind. I use to tell myself if I just gave it time or change who I am that maybe we would have a chance. We were so young and so in love, everything about our lives for a short while was like a dream but with like all dream you wake up. What i was awaken to was a life unfamiliar....When did it become that way and why was I living this dream when clearly his had a different outcome? I go over and over it in my head, months and years of life that I did everything right, and I am not saying to make myself sound better it simply is the truth. When something like this happens to a person, they make excuse, and find reason for the others behavior and worse of all blame them self. I have found myself doing all of the above but underneath it all, these problem are his, these decision are his and I will no longer let his choices and lack of life effect our children and myself. This once fairy tale life I thought I had is know a big question mark, all the memorable moments are tainted with the thought of other women in the back of his mind. So many people will give you advice on what and what not to do but there is no right way, no right words. Even now I question my decision and action through out the past 6 months. I gave it everything I had and even more then I had, stayed for what it seem like an eternity and endure torture and pain I wish not even on the naive girl that believes that her and him actually have a chance at something real. As crazy as it sounds, I am thankful for all the events leading up to this. I feel like a child again, God has given me the strengths and understanding to realize that I have no control over this life. It is not mine but his, and what he has planned for the future for this Lil Reynolds Family is so much bigger and better then I could ever imagine. Just the thought of what I know will happen, it just gets better from here. I will complete school and be successful, my precious boys will be running around like normal learning and experiencing life better then before because nothing will hold us down any longer. I think the hardest part of all this is just erasing that dream, the plan I had from the beginning, but plans change and so do people. At this moment the idea of a relationship make me cringe, I have buried who I was and become something different. My mission for the New Years, found Vanessa. I will breathe the fresh air and enjoy everything life has to offer. And one day, sooner or later there will be that one person. I will be his world, his breathe.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I love this guy

I love that the other day, I wrote about Justin and now this.  Let me say one more time how amazing this guy is. So I have been wanting a DSLR forever and hell-o they are expensive, anyways I always talk about them to Justin and he really doesn't understand the difference between and point and shoot and a DSLR so he just listens to me talk and I pointed out one in the best buy Monday night while we were booking our Florida trip.  Justin goes to school Tuesday morning and when he arrived home I was all crazy chasing kids around and cleaning when Braxton comes out of my mom with a Nikon D3100 around his neck and says " Happy Mothers Day". I almost cried but I was to excited.  I know it isn't mothers day yet but in The Reynolds don't do very well with surprises but I was defiantly surprised.  I was just thinking about buying a cheap digital camera because mine is broke and my lover went and blew my mind.  I love this guy




Saturday, April 30, 2011

My Dream Come True

I was cleaning the kitchen while listening to Pandora and a Rascal Flats song " I won't let you go" came on and I had to come to computer to put down these feelings. October 2004, I worked at this grocery store in Magnolia "Brookshire Bros" I hated the job but I was a senior in HS and had bills to pay.  I was doing my usual duties as a checker when this extremely attractive guys comes in and starts working as a stocker.  Little did I know then that this guy that I had a high school crush would become the biggest part of my life.  Justin and I got married shortly after in June of 2005.  Going through marriage as a teenager was probably the most difficult thing anyone can do, and living in Korea alone did not help.  When I look back at the 6 years that Justin and have been married, I wouldn't take any of it back because in this moment we are so perfect. Justin is the most hard-working, self-righteous man I've known in my life time.  It brings me to tears to think about the life we both have had to endure through the military and  life in general . I am so grateful that we have conquered all. When it comes to being a Father, he blows my mind. After slave driving for me around the house and getting off from and already stressful job, he gladly accept to take over the ninja duty with Braxton.  Coming from a household where I never experienced a man playing with his children let alone being concerned, I pray thanks to God every night for allowing me to share my life with him.  Most young girls have dreams about the perfect guy, the guy you describe as the perfect husband to your friends. Lucky me I I have found that guy, and he choose me.  Me, crazy, loud, overly-sensitive and shy to be his partner for a life time.  I am not sure what I did to deserve such an amazing life, I am not saying that my life is perfect but I am happy with all the imperfections and my dreamy husband. -Vanessa 


Sunday, April 10, 2011

Soccer

I am a little late with this post, because I think we are on our fourth week in Soccer but wanted to be able to look back and remember this. Braxton has been obsessed with soccer for a while now, thanks to The Backyardigans and the Soccer Monster but I am glad he choose soccer as the first sport because the team just runs around regardless of directions the coach gives them. Braxton is still very hesitant to do ANYTHING without me or Justin standing next to him but when I am the one standing back and watching Justin run beside him and almost make me cry to think that in just a few short years this child that is so afraid to be without mommy or daddy won't even look back to make sure we haven't ran off. So I vowed to instead of getting so frustrated that I have to hold Gunner and chase the coach with all the kids so Braxton can warm, to just love that he even wants me to run beside him. It bring me to tears just thinking about it. I am totally fine with having the whiny kid because I don't want him to leave me ever...hah, I know he is only three but the time goes by so fast. Moving on from these emotions, I am almost positive Braxton is the best player on the team and I am not just saying that because he is my kid, it is so true.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Spring Break

Omg, I am so bad at updating especially since I can see the end of the tunnel with this semester. The boys keep me busy and we finally are starting to get somewhere with the backyard ( i will post some picture to follow). So the signs of summer are amongst us and you am so excited. I am especially white and have not been to the gym in two weeks but who cares last year at this time I was huge prego so I think I have made a bit of an improvement. Just a few weeks back we went on our first family vacation to San Antonio. Our first stop, The River Walk. I think this was my first time to go with a child in head so it was a little nerve racking because you have like 3 feet on sidewalk to share with the whole world so that sucks but once we got on the river boat and ate dinner we were done with all that.
Next up was the Alamo, which Braxton could really care a-less for but I always enjoy just standing there staring at it, I love history and to have something so beautiful in our sights with such a story, i could stay there forever. If I had more free time I would probably be one of those history nerds that do the reenactments, that would be bad ass, except that I am a women and they didn't do much fighting so I would have to dress as a man.

We were only in San Antonio for the night and the next morning was Sea World. It was Braxton's first time to go and I hadn't been probably since I was like 6 so I was just as excited. He was a little unsure of the Killer Whale, one because of his name and two because he loves Finding Nemo and the Whale in there eats Dorie, so that is what he says. During the show he was on top of Justin the whole time but after wards he was talking about the "whale killer" so I do believe he enjoy it. The day was filled with Sea Lion Shows, Penguins and THE SHARKS!!! It was packed because of Spring Break but beside that I loved it, and plans to go back very soon...especially since we bought fun passes, good till 01/12.






Thursday, February 24, 2011

Updating

I am serious need of a update, so if the page looks like a mess come back in about a week or two. In till then forgive me.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Iheartfaces


This week we enter our little love into a photo contest on smile at
, so go over and check it out.








The holidays have come to a close and I am surprised to say that I am glad that life is back to normal. I say normal but as normal as it will get in two weeks Justin and I will both be in school for the first time together and not to sure how I feel about this, I just pray that all goes well. Back to the holidays... Santa was good to us and our boys, well mainly Braxton but he is 3 and it's all worth it. His amazing Papal gifted him with his first big boy four wheeler and he is now forgot about his scooter and new bicycle he got for his birthday for the four wheeler. We have had about 4 Christmases and still missed one but we can make up for it next year.


So we have decided to start the New Year off with some home renovation,our fireplace. For starters it was super ugly and now its gone and we are rebuilding and which I am so happy about it. We have moved our t.v from one wall to over the fireplace and I love it. Let me say when I say we I really mean Justin because I usually just watch and give my opinion. It is a work in progress but love it already.